Now it came to pass in the days of Bill Clinton, he is the Bill Clinton who was President of the United States, fifty states, from Maine even until Hawaii. Now in those days, he made a great campaign party at $10,000 a plate, with $50,000 a head to stay at the White House. And Democrats and supporters came from all around and brought millions of dollars into Clinton's campaign coffers, making it an incredible success. At the height of the party, Bill commanded his aides to bring forth the First Lady, Hillary Rodham Clinton. But Hillary refused to attend, being too involved in Whitewater investments. Bill was angry and said unto his aides, "What shall be done to Hillary who refuses to appear?" Then Dick Morris said, "Let Hillary be removed and let the President gather all the beautiful interns together in the White House, so that the President will pick the intern who pleases him the most and she will be the President's companion, in place of Hillary." And the advice pleased Bill Clinton and he did so. Now there was a certain Jewish lawyer in Los Angeles whose name was William Ginsburg, and he had a client named Monica Lewinsky and she was a member of his synagogue. And Monica was of beautiful form and fair to look at. So when the President's decree was published, Monica, being a White House intern, was taken before Bill Clinton. And she pleased the President above all other interns and Bill took her as his special companion and he had a close emotional relationship with her and bought her gifts including a dress and a book of poetry. But Monica kept her Jewishness a secret as instructed by her attorney. Now in those days, Linda Tripp and Lucianne Goldberg conspired to tape record the President, but William Ginsburg heard about it and reported it to the Secret Service. As a result, Tripp and Goldberg were thrown out of the White House and lost their visiting privileges, and the incident was recorded in the White House Logbook. After these things, Ken Starr was made Independent Counsel to investigate the President but William Ginsburg would not cooperate with him. Then Starr was filled with wrath and he vowed to indict not just Ginsburg but also all the Jews in the United States, from the oldest to the youngest, including Jews by birth, choice, patrilineal, etc., etc., and he decided to do it on the 14th day of Adar. Now when William Ginsburg heard what Starr intended to do, he put on sackcloth and ashes and urged all the Jews to say the Shema and otherwise pray. Then he went to Monica and bade her to go to the President to annul the harsh decrees. But Monica said, "I haven't been allowed to barge in on the President for the last 30 days. In fact I've even signed an affidavit stating that I haven't had sex with him during that time." William Ginsburg said, "Who knows whether you have not become the President's intern just for a time as this!" So Monica agreed to go and asked her lawyer to have all Jews pray for her. Then Monica put on her sexiest outfit, with the law cut blouse and sexy black stockings with high heels and pushed her way into the Oval Office. And Bill Clinton said unto her, "Monica, we can do it right here, I mean what is your request?" I will give you even up to half of my campaign funds." Monica replied, "Let the President and Ken Starr meet me tonight at my Watergate apartment for a romantic dinner." Bill Clinton and Ken Starr went to Monica's pad and at dinner Bill said, "Monica, what is your request?" and she replied, "I'd like both of you to come again tomorrow night for supper." Then Ken Starr went back to his office and said to Paula Jones, "I'm going to get the goods on Clinton. I'm sure Monica is going to cooperate. She invited me with Clinton to her apartment again tomorrow night. Yet all this is nothing unless I get William Ginsburg." Then Paula Jones told him to file a fifty count indictment on attorney Ginsburg and it pleased Starr. Now Clinton could not sleep that night, worrying about new scandals surfacing, so he read the White House Logbook and saw that William Ginsburg was not rewarded for stopping Linda Tripp and Lucianne Goldberg from taping the President. So he called Ken Starr and said, "What should be done to the Man that the President desires to honor?" Starr, thinking it was him, replied, "Let the Man whom the President desires to honor stand next to the President as he gives the State of the Union Address, let him be on CNN, Larry King Live, and all the television interview shows." So Clinton said. "Make haste and do so for William Ginsburg." And Starr made all the arrangements so that Ginsburg stood next to the President at the State of the Union Address, was interviewed by Larry King and appeared on CNN, Face the nation and Meet the Press. Then Ken Starr told Paula Jones what happened and she said to him, "My Daddy is a Minister and he says that the Jews are the Chosen People and if William Ginsburg is Jewish you're in big trouble." Then Starr and Bill Clinton went by limousines to Monica's Watergate Apartment, next door to Bob dole, for a cozy dinner. Bill again asked Monica, "What is your Petition? I'll give you even up to half of my campaign funds." Monica said, "Mr. President, I and my people are to be indicted." And Bill asked, "Who is he that seeks to indict you?" Monica, pointing to Starr, said, "An adversary, an enemy, this wicked Ken Starr who seeks to indict you too!" Bill arose in fury and Ken Starr, terrified, fell on the sofa where Monica was. Then Bill aid, "Will he even force himself on my intern in front of me?" Then Mike McCurry said, "Behold, the fifty count indictment that Starr was preparing for William Ginsburg!" Clinton said, "Indict Starr on it instead!" and he removed him as Special Prosecutor. Then Bill Clinton appointed William Ginsburg Special Prosecutor, and he quashed all the indictments against Monica Lewinsky, Bill Clinton and all the Jewish People. Instead he indicted Linda Tripp, Lucianne Goldberg, Paula Jones, Gennifer Flowers, Katherine Willey and the whole Right Wing Conspiracy. And as a result Bill Clinton dealt favorably with Israel and with its leader Benjamin Netanyahu and called, "Time Out" on pressuring Israel. So the Rabbis in Israel proclaimed Monica Lewinsky to be another Queen Esther and commanded the Jews to celebrate Purim.