Subject: mama Three sons of a Yiddishe Mama left their homeland, went abroad and prospered. They discussed the gifts they were able to give their old mother. AVRAHAM, the first, said: "I built a big house for our mother." MOISHE, the second, said: "I sent her a Mercedes with a driver." DAVID, the youngest, said: "You remember how our mother enjoys reading the Torah. Now she can't see very well. So I sent her a remarkable parrot that recites the whole Torah. It took the greatest rabbis 12 years to teach him. Mama just has to name the chapter and verse and the parrot recites it." Soon thereafter, a letter of thanks came from their mother. AVRAHAM, she said, the house you built is so huge. I live only in one room, but I have to clean the whole house. MOISHE, she said, I am too old to travel. I stay most of the time at home so I rarely use the Mercedes. And that driver has shpilkas -- he's a pain in the tuchas. But DAVID, she said, THE CHICKEN WAS DELICIOUS!