Shmuel Carit Posted: April 7, 2000 Some reasons I love Israel: You get off a bus at a relatively isolated intersection or tsomet and you're met by a bunch of kids - yeshiva girls in their floor length, dirt-sweeping skirts, together with boys dolled up with their hair moosed and spiked - and they're offering jelly donuts to the soldiers - free of charge - in honor of Chanukah. Because of my natural prejudices, when I see a young man in jeans, leather boots, and a torn t-shirt - possibly with not the nicest phrase written across his chest - I automatically think, "trash." Well, at least until he reaches for the mezuzah and kisses it, so naturally, before he enters or leaves the store. I sat in the front seat of the Egged bus. I was determined that I was going to give my seat to an elderly man or woman as needed. Well, I saw my chance as an elderly woman was at the next bus stop. The bus stopped and ..... all of a sudden the small, skinny kid on the other side of the aisle beat me to the punch. HE got up and gave her HIS seat! I tried again. I sat in the front seat of the Egged bus. I was determined that I was going to give my seat to an elderly man or woman. The other front row seats were already taken by the genetically advanced group. I was sitting, I might add, near a very attractive, blonde, policewoman. As an aging Rabbi (long white beard and all) climbed the steps into the bus I offered my seat. No, not so fast - again. The policewoman offered her seat. I said, "No, it's ok, I'll get up." She said the Rabbi would in all likelyhood rather sit near me than her. So she got up and the Rabbi sat next to me. Wow! When I ask managers when the projects will be ready, no matter what the answer is, it's always follwed by, B'EzRat HaShem. "How are you?" > "BaRuch HaShem." More of my prejudice getting in the way..... A car was driving around Mevaseret with a loudspeaker asking for donations for a certain cause. Very obviously dati people were inside collecting the contributions. My daughter-in-law ran over and contributed. But then also from nowhere came a young woman, not exactly dressed for the Bet HaKnesset, and sporting what we former Americans don't consider classic fashion, also added her donation. I have a long way to go about my preconceived notions about people. Always give people the benefit of the doubt. Ya never know....... What a fabulous country...........! ------------------ 12/8/99 I do some traveling across the border into Jordan occasionally. Upon returning to Israel I have to go through the normal Israeli security border checks. The person in charge at Passport Control notes that my passport is American and that I'm Jewish. (Perhaps my kippah is a dead give-a-way. I don't show it off in Jordan, so I naturally let it show in Israel.) She looks at me puzzled. "Why don't you live in Israel", she asks? "Why are you ONLY a tourist?" Is this the reason I was given an unusually thourough security check? I was actually taken into a private room and grilled about my trip to Amman, and had my bags searched. It's 7:00AM on an Egged bus to Vehr Veis Voo. The Chayal next to me is engrossed in a Agatha Christie paperback. In English. Wait. What's that on his lap? It's an electronic dictionary for those English words he doesn't know. I'm in a warehouse in Casaerea. I ask, "Where's the boss?" "Upstairs," someone answers. "No, God is upstairs." What a country...........! A young woman gets on the bus at Ben Gurion Airport. She shows the bus driver her student ID and wants the discount. The bus driver rather dryly apologizes and says, "Sorry, no student discounts." The student mumbles something under her breath about what a strange system this is and moves on to take her seat. I step up next and give the driver my 20 shekel and was going to declare that I was a Chever Knesset ( member of the Israeli Parliment), but thought better of it and simply declared that I'm a tourist. "Any tourist discounts?", I ask. The driver gives me a look and a giant grin develops. He gets up and announces to the passengers, " Hey everyone, he's tourist!" He sits back down and looks at me again. This time a stern look has replaced the grin. He looks me in the eye and says, "Come and live in Israel and I"ll give you a great big discount." What a lovely kiddush the shul had after davening. The occasion? An Aufruf. "Who did the catering," I ask. "The mother of the Choson. She's a great baker." The rules of the shul are that any member can prepare food for the kiddush. But that's changing. After all, how can you trust everyone's kashrut? There are all different kinds of standards. Sounds like the States. I don't know why, but the love of two young people for each other is something I find real exciting. Ever see the look on the eyes of one for the other? What are they thinking? What if you don't even know the couple? What kind of relationship do they have? What really is behind those looks? Are they just flirting? Is it something more? What happened last weekend, last night? The looks - even from a distance - are so.... romatic, thrilling, evocative, and yes, at times erotic. Add to all this the ingredients if the Israeli Army uniform. Am I a wierdo? I don't know. I just saw an Egged bus driver. Fom a distance - across the way, he was talking, or was it something else, to a ChaYelet (female soldier). Noone really said anything. They were mouthing the message. As the bus pulled away with the driver smiling, the ChaYelet had a curious grin on her face. Egged buses have a water spout in the front of the bus. I haven't really seen anyone use one until today. This really cool guy, I guess had sticky hands, and needed a little water. That was ok until he took out the roll of bathroom tissue (TOILET PAPER!) from his windbreaker to dry his hands. Real cool. Hey, it's Israel. Because I travel to our cousins in various small villages and countries next door (Jordan), I'm always concerned a bit about getting lost. Just a bit. I don't speak their language and I'm not sure I'll meet up with someone who speaks my language. So I came up wih this great idea. I bought a spiral notebook with like 5 X 7 index cards. I asked my friend Ashraf to mark down in Arabic the various addresses and locations that I needed. (Of course I headed each card with the information in English so I would know which card to show Yassir when I got lost.) Great idea, right? I thought so, until I wondered why so many of my queries resulted in big smiles from the folks I stopped to ask. You see Ashraf wrote at the top of each card in Arabic, "This Israeli fool travelling alone is lost. Allah wants you to show him the way to heaven." -------------------- 12/12/99 Recently, I've experienced an outpouring of emotion related to saying Hallel. The first event happened when I was holding my Lulalv and Esrog (now referred to as an eTrog) on Sukkot. I was davening with Uri in the Yeshiva in Mevaseret. The Bet HaKnesset had windows that looked out onto the view to Yerushalayim. It's a great view. Breathtaking. You have to come and see it. I was just so overtaken with emotions at davening with my son, now a father, holding the Arba Minim, seeing Yerushalayim in the distance, thinking about how my parents and their parents before them and their parents before them only dreamt that such a scene could possible. The next scene was Shabbat Chanukah in Neve Aliza, Ginot Shomron. The tune that the chazzan used at the end of Hallel was one that back in Fair Lawn would always bring a smile to my face and that of my good buddy, Janusz, as the chazzan sang it. From the first "AyeYai" we would stop, turn, and look at each other and simply smile. It was a magical moment. There are some tunes that in the environs of a shul the chazzan can make emotional associations for years to come, if not forever. I don't know if you can call it a "religious experience," but it's certainly powerful. I was on my way to Neve Aliza for Shabbat. I had to take a bus from Bnei Brak. For the uninitiated, Bnei Brak is a very religious city. For example, it's unusual to see a woman in pants or men wearing shirts that aren't white. (Stuey's modern definition of religious.) There are more than one or two stores that sell photos of famous Rabbis. In all sizes and shapes. Some framed, some just stuffed to the gills in a shoe box. I chose one of a Rav that had an expression that I just couldn't pull myself away from. This picture was so captivating. I felt as if he was staring right at me. I was going to buy not one, but one for Uri & Aliza and even one for their neighbors. The picture would have to hold a special place on their wall, together with the likes of the Steipler and Rav Shlomo Zalman. As I went to pay, I asked the guy behind the counter who was this scary looking. "Rov?" "That's not a Rov, that's the Ayatollah Khomeini!" Picture this if you can. You just learned how to drive. You're making your first solo trip from Tel Aviv to Jerusalem. Easy enough. Just follow the signs. Yea, riiiiiiight. At a certain point along the way the sign posts above tell you Jerusalem to the right and Bat-Yam to the left. Fine. Now Israel is so advanced that not only do they have sign posts above, but at times the paved roadways are marked with the name of the town that the road leads to. Of course, they couldn't paint Jerusalem in big block letters - in Hebrew- it's too big. So they decided to abbreviate it. That's right in Hebrew. And you guessed it - the abbreviation? A big YUD MEM all the way down the road on the right. And that's not the whole story either. The rest of the story is that down along the left roadway to Bat-Yam- you guessed it: A big YUD MEM! Sometimes, these days, when I review the Torah portion of the week which discusses the unfolding of Jewish history, and the journey's of our ancestors to and fro, I find it's real easy to insert myself into the picture. Either into the actual story that the Torah is telling or creating a new Biblical story with ME as the star. Can you picture me as a shepherd with a turban and a staff (forget about the tent in the dessert with the harem). There are certain immutable facts in life about life. For example, my wife Ruth is the most clever and creative person I know. Another fact is that I truly believe God has a sense of humor. I just got my car; my first day of driving alone in Israel. There's a drought in Israel. It hasn't rained in months. Guess when the monsoon begins? You guessed it - the morning I started driving in Israel there was a flood equal to the one in Noah's time. Another immutable fact: War is hell. Soldiers, Chayalim, especially young ones, are scared of battle. Yet, the look of the Chayal, as I picked him up in the rain and started shifting gears on my stick shift just doesn't compare...... Israel is a country where miracles happen. Not just during the wars. Everyone has war stories. What happened during this war and that war and how they momish saw the hand of God. They were saved, their family, friends were saved, and, well everyone. Well now I have a miracle story. You see I have no sense of direction and I've never been good at reading maps. My occupation now requires that I be in different parts of the country each and every day. I sit down with my maps every night and figure out how to get to where I have to go the next day. Right, I chart out a course. Captain Stu. Here's the miracle part: I haven't gotten lost yet! It's a whole two days. What a country. Thanks God. When I'm driving to wherever I have to go I try to pick up "trampers." For those in the dark, "trampers" are hitchhikers in Israel. Once I get them in the car, WHAM BAHM! "Chabibi, what's gonna be with the Golan? Are WE giving it back? (I've been here a few weeks so it's my Golan also. There's a discussion going on elsewhere if in fact the Golan belongs to the Jews in the Diaspora as well......) I try to sound really informed about all the various sides of the issue. In my best Hebrew and in my best Israeli accent. Most times the Chayalim, soldiers, who are the majority of trampers, look bored at the American trying to get into Israeli society. Nuu, nu. It's always problematic when you try to impress someone. Something's gonna backfire. Even, or especially, from a religious vantage point we say in Hallel and in Brich Shemay, before taking out the Torah, to put your faith and trust in the Almighty, not in man or the angels. Well, as part of my travels, I've met some sewing factory owners and some factory owners. Yaish VeYaish. One man named Elli is fabulously wealthy. He was able to retire at the age of 31. He stayed retired for a few years until he went out of his mind. So he continued to build garment manufacturing plants all over the world. Not because he needed to, but for the challenge. He's also a really nice guy. So, Elli asked me to meet him at the Israeli-Jordan border crossing one morning for a trip to his plant in Jordan. OK. Been there, done that. "What time, Elli?" "Well, I usually go three days a week and I get there when it opens. 6:30AM." "Ah, that means from Yerushalayim I'd have to leave at about 4:00AM!" "OK, so I'll see you there." Well, I got there at 6:00. Elli arrived at 6:20 and boy was he impressed. Boy, I was all smiles inside. We proceded to Passport Control and I excused myself to take a few minutes in the Restroom. Elli called out me that he'd meet me at the station. I thought to myself that I'd better hurry. So I did. Once in Jordan I did what started to become second nature to me: I tapped my waist to see if my pele-phone was there. It wasn't. Holy moly! I left it in the Men's Room. What am I gonna do? Ask the 85 year old parking lot attendant to walk over to the Men's Room and fetch my pele-phone? What if Israeli security finds it and blows it up? (Of course, first they would ascertain that it was MY pele-phone.) So, I sheepishly walked over to Elli and told him that I think, ah, ah, that I, ah ah, left my pele-phone in the toilet. He looked me square in the eye and said, "Hey, it happens." He called someone at the border crossing to hold it for me til I got back. ----------------- 12/21/99 I was listening to Israeli radio today. Now that I'm driving I listen to a lot of radio. The topic on the news was the recent catastrophe in Venuzuela. The moderator of the show asked his guest why Israel wasn't helping the victims of the disaster. The response was that with Syrian peace talks and giving up the Golan in the news and the upcoming millennium, and Ramadan, the Israeli humanitarian effort wouldn't make the papers and there wouldn't even be room for heart-wrenching photos. The moderator was amazed. Now I don't know anything about the moderator, but I highly doubt he's "religious." But his response to his guest was "How cynical of you! We are Yisroel! We don't do things that way." [At this time the Israelis ARE helping the disaster victims.] More radio. This time an afternoon, drive-time talk show called "Pitchon Peh" - loosley translated as "your opportunity to speak." The host, Gideon, also probably not-yet observant was talking about a program aired a month earlier concerning a widow and her family. Their house burnt to a crisp. Nothing was saved. No clothing. No furniture. No nothing. Well a month later due to the unsolicited response by the listeners to assist, the family is in a new home close to their old one. The home is furnished and the kids have what to wear. The radio show host declared, "Now this is the true nature of the Israeli people!" Well, it had to happen and it did. I saw Elvis in Israel. I stopped for gas right near the Latrun Interchange. They have something actually called "The Elvis Inn at Jerusalem." There's a giant gold statue of Elvis outside. Lots of Elvis stuff inside. Photo attachment to follow for those fans or non-believers. I was on my way to Anin, a small Arab kfar or village between Chadera and Afula, near the larger Arab city of Um el-Fahm, where Yoko Ono recently held an exhibition. I do a lot driving these days. Hopefully, I'll learn some geography along the way. Anyway, I asked the local Israeli Army soldiers in their security barricade-check point for directions. Just to be sure I was going the right way. I had my trusty map, but I just wanted to be sure. The gingy chayal (red-haired soldier) looked at me like I was nuts, but pointed me in the right direction. After about 15 minutes I knew I was going the wrong way. My cousins were only too helpful in setting me straight. When I got back to the "machsom" the 14 year old gingy-haired soldier was sooooooo apologetic. Almost nervous laughing, but so happy to see me in one piece. A car story. This one's good. I set out as usual early in the morning. This time to Gaza. The area is called Erez. It may be familiar to you because Barak often meets there for negotiations. Also, it's the crossing point for many Palestinians into Israel. Anyway...... I'm on the Jerusalem-Tel Aviv highway and turn off at the Latrun Interchange. After about 15 minutes and all of a sudden the lights on my dashboard light up. Oh no! No oil? I only have the car a week. I pull over to the side of the road. I try starting it again. No luck. Cars and trucks are just whizzing by me. I wait a few more minutes to re-start the car. No luck - no mazal. Just then I notice in my rear view mirror a giant - and I mean giant - tractor trailer coming up behind me on the shoulder where I'm parked. Great, some help. Wait. He's not stopping! He stops so close to my tuchis, that definitely he would've been liable for inappropriate closeness between two adults. He apparently was riding the shoulder to allow others to pass him. At this point I got out the car - quickly. What if someone else does NOT notice me in time. I fished out my fluorescent triangle from the trunk and set it up behind my broken down Fiat. As I called for help and left voice mail messages with everyone and their savtas, jet planes were flying overhead and landing nearby. I don't know if they were F-16's or X-10's or what, but they looked real cool. I always carry a camera with me. Ya neva know. So, I fished out my camera and started snapping away. Real cool. After a few minutes I hear helicopters and then sirens. Wow. This is really cool. No, wait. They're coming closer. Towards me! In Hebrew and English the Apache attack helicopter orders me away from my car and to keep my arms in the air, away from my sides and my fingers spread apart - like I'm gonna be a cohain and duchan. Oh, sugar! (Actually I didn't say "sugar," I said something else in English that a new, religious, oleh shouldn't say.) They approached me slowly and with caution. Me, Stuey Pilichowski - international enemy and Spy numero uno. Oh, no. They're gonna find I'm packing thread trimming scissors. They're gonna put me away for life. I'm never gonna see Ruth again. Avi Weiss is gonna have to visit me in jail. (By the way, I've passed many Israeli jails on my travels. They're actually quite nice looking - from the outside, anyway.) As they approached, the Major General, I think he said his name was Yossi, asked me who I was working for. I told him Sesby, Ltd - it's a buying office for the garment industry. What a puzzled look he had. New uniforms for the pilots? Could it be? No. He said the Air Base was a military secret. I never saw any jets. Never saw any MP's. It was all a dream. Keep it in the back of my head for future experience. Now get out of here. Great, "get out of here" - how, General Yossi? My car won't start! By coincidence (!?!?!) a few minutes later a giant flat bed tow truck (it's probably used for Merkavah tanks) pulls up and asks me if I need any help. Yeah, sure. He tows me into Jerusalem to fix my timing mechanism. The moral of the story: You guess it: "Timing is everything" (sorry, I couldn't resist.) There's a new pedestrian walkway in Ramat Gan. It actually extends from the railroad station to the stock exchange over a stretch of the Ayalon Highway. It's really quite nice and a wonderful convenience. But...... (you knew that was coming, right?) In order to use it you must go through a turnstile which requires a ticket - like a MetroCard. Initially I thought this was for the purposes of the train. Or something. It's not for counting because simply turning the turnstile will effect a count. So, how do you get a ticket? You go to the ticket vending machine. You have options to buy a railrioad ticket to various parts of the country, excluding Jerusalem, by the way. You also have the option of getting a ticket for the walkway turnstile free of charge. Free? I kept hitting the button and the tickets kept on coming. You take the ticket and insert it through the machine just like the MetroCard. Why, for heaven's sake? I don't know. 12/23/99 I've finally found an apartment. It's like a studio. I like to think of it as a loft. Sounds cooler. Even though, or perhaps because, I'm now Israeli, I still wanna be cool. Do you know what it's like living out of a suitcase or from three or four shelves for like six weeks? In case you don't I'll tell you. It happens to be great if you're doing it with your family. Son, daughter-in-law, and granddaughter. Their love and outpouring of doing for me anything plus was always above and beyond the call of duty. While I, of course, would do the same, who would want the intrusion when there's a 6 month old (yes, 6 months already!) around and things are always hopping. there door is literally never closed and there are always people coming in and out. Mostly students. (Sound familiar?) So I'll probably move sometime in the next few days. I'll be back for Shabbat mostly. Actually early Friday mornings to help with the shopping. I've got a car, you know. Precious comodity. Especially to a Kollel couple. New bumper sticker being offered at all major intersections throughout the country: HaAm Im HaGolan. This was very popular a few years ago and is making a comeback for obvious reasons. A new one that's starting to crop up is: HaAm BLi HaGolan. Uh Oh. Remember my escapade breaking down on a long-winding deserted road? Well, there's a bit more to it. You see, the tow truck driver was going in the opposite direction than me. I learned that he was on his way to pick up someone else that had broken down. When he saw me in distress he was fulfilling the mitzvah of "hokim tukim." In the Bible it refers to helping someone whose load has fallen off his donkey. In modern times it could be helping someone with a flat or has broken down on the highway. I learned this while he drove me to the mechanic in Jerusalem. He was on the radio with his boss and mentioned that he picked me up. His boss was rather upset that his steady client was waiting somewhere for his tow truck to arrive - for an hour already - and he was helping a poor stuck soul. A poor stuck soul that wasn't even a customer or likely to be a customer. I pretended that because I was American I didn't understand what was being said over the radio. Israel is very much into its citizens following the law. Here's a radio commercial currently running: A voice mail message states: "You have reached the office of the Chief Executive Officer. He can't come to the phone right now because he's in jail. Please leave a message or call back in three years." I picked up a chayal (Israeli soldier) this afternoon. We talked about what he was going to do following his Army service. Going to the States was an option, but not for a while. He said he wants to get a Phd. in Physics and teach in University. I asked him if he's doing anything during his army service that's related to his interest in Physics. There was a long pause, and then he said he couldn't talk about it. (OR he'd have to kill me afterwards....) I mentioned how my nephew Avner did a lot of programming for the army because he was good at it, even though that wasn't his specific task in the service. The chayal softened and said he has a physics project going in the Army that has already passed muster. If it continues on it's present successful course, the Army will reap tons of money and revolutionize I don't know what. I've got two cars in the shop! I've been in Israel less than two months. I've been driving on my own for about a week. I got a Fiat last week (999,999 km) that lasted a week before the timing mechanism and a few other operations had to take place on it. I was given a VW tank (77,000 km) as a replacement till my NEW car comes through. I picked it up on Thursday afternoon in Tel Aviv and drove it to Yerushalayim. On Friday morning I drove into Yerushalayim for a little shopping. Saturday night I took a couple back to Yeshiva University. So hardly any driving. Sunday morning many, many miles down south. Then back to the Yerushalayim area. So hardly any driving, right? Well, I lost it - or rather the car lost its clutch or gears or something on Rechov King George and Ben Yehuda. A nice quiet street. Ah, the lovely, holy sound of cars honking in the Holy City. I think my picture will be on the front page of the Jerusalem Post tomorrow. I get to pick up the Fiat from the mechanic tomorrow. The owner of the car or the fleet, when I called him said I was a jinx. "I'm a jinx!?!?!," I yelled. "YOU'RE THE JINX, " I yelled........... "QUOTE OF THE WEEK": Life is fragile - handle with prayer A point of information: I don't talk to all the people that I pick up hitching (or "tremping" as they say in Hebrew). Sometimes I let them rest and relax and even take a short nap. Sometimes they even let me rest and relax a little and take a short snooze......... I was on the way to Tel Aviv this morning on the Jerusalem -Tel Aviv highway. There was more than the usual traffic jam and I wondered why? There it was. The reason why everyone was slowing down. A new highway ramp was going to open and it was all decorated. It had flags and banners and a tent-like structure surrounding part of it. Police were all around. I guess the dignitaries were to arrive soon along with the marching band. Did they do the same for Routes 4 and 17? 12/28/99 In the makolet (local grocery store) this morning, a woman (definitely not your "religious" type - I could tell by her belly-button) bought some items and received some change. The change was in coins and one coin, a 10 shekel coin, the equivalent of between 3 and 4 dollars, but in Israel it's like 10 bucks, fell to the floor. After searching for a few minutes, she couldn't find it. She mentioned to the cashier/owner that when he finds her 10 shekels to please put it in the charity box. ........ One thing that I've been noticing on the Israeli highways as it gets near dark: A lot of cars are parked on the shoulder. They're not stuck. The drivers are taking a time out to check in with God. They're davening Mincha. ........ Local Israeli politics: A ô÷ç (pee-kay-ach) is one who can get out of a jam. A çëí(chuh-chum) is one who never gets into the jam in the first place. ......... How did you spend the Millennium weekend? I was in Mizpeh Yericho (a hop, skip and a jump from Jericho). I spent it with a wonderful family from Fair Lawn who were visiting relatives that live there. Also joining us for Shabbat were some of their old friends that currently live in Haifa. For a Sabra, Israeli family they were very ignorant about all things Jewish. Yet, they respected all the Shabbat traditions, asked loads of questions, and participated actively in all discussions concerning beliefs and attitudes. They lead a very simple life and are currently curious enough to participate in a Shabbat seminar that'll be held in the Old City of Yerushalayim. ............. I was thinking about the US version of "tremping" (hitching a ride). Then it came to me. This is how it's done in the States. Say I want to go to Teaneck from Fair Lawn. Do I stand on Route 4 East and stick out my thumb? No. I pick up the phone and say, "'Know anybody going to Teaneck?" until I get a positive response. ........... I hate to say this, but one thing that's hard to get used to in Israel is Israelis and their physical stance and distance. Why does a group decide to stop and talk at the entrance or exit of an escalator? Why don't they move when you're approaching? They always seem to be in the way and don't move when you'd think they'd naturally get out of the way. This occurs even when you happen to be standing, let's say at your spot in shul, holding your siddur. Someone will come by and disregard the fact that they're heading right for your siddur. They'll just knock into it. Simple. No apology. After all, what'd they do wrong? ................ Sometimes when I'm writing these things I feel like a Seinfeld-type. ................. Israeli conversations never begin after, "Hello." Hello is followed by "Mah InYaNim?" or "Mah HaMaTsav?" Only then can you get down to the purpose of the call. ............. For those thinking about a trip to Israel, now's a great time. The skiing is great at the Hermon, the warmth of the beach at Eilat is just right, the tourists here for Chag HaNoLad (Christmas) are on their way out, the Y2K and Millennium celebrations are toning down, political discussions are rampant as they always will be, with talk of returning the Golan, and political irregularities. And don't forget this Shabbat is Rosh Chodesh Shevat. That means only two weeks to Tu B'Shvat. In Israel there's only oneTu B'Shvat seder. I tend to think every Israeli is an expert in the Hebrew language. One way of realizing this is not true is by noticing how many Israelis spell Shevat with a "Tuf" at the end instead of a "Tet." It then looks like and is mistaken for the word "Shabbat." .......... I know Israelis, especially in small Yishuvim (settlements), are very comfortable about things in general. This was especially true in Shul this Shabbat morning in Mizpe Yericho. In the middle of davening a little boy walked in to see his Abba barefoot and in his pajamas. When's the last time you saw that happen in the US? ............. Was anyone at the Woodcliff Lake Hilton over the Millennium Shabbat? .......................... I've been living with U & A & A these last many weeks. Sunday evening begins my stay in Neve Aliza. Now I'm going to learn what Ruthie's going through. Wish me luck. I'll need it. ........................... Do you think today's Chalutzim or pioneers in Israel are those people willing to leave their homes in the Golan for the sake of Peace? Used to be: Build Now it's: Dismantle ........ I never really watched the TV sit-com, "Everybody Loves Raymond, " but apparently it just landed in Israel. I heard a review on the radio this morning. Now my Hebrew isn't the greatest, but I think the gist of the criticism was that the title doesn't hold true in Israel. ................ Avigayil's is doing so many things. All of a sudden. She's ticklish everywhere. She's got a great disposition. The best or wierdest is the toy atop her tray on the high chair. It a kind of mynah bird figure. The beak opens. Avigayil MUST close the beak. We can do this experiment tens of times. We open / She closes. We open / She closes. She can be screaming bloody murder, she'll pause and close the beak. It's hilarious. ........... Big topic of discussion on the news this morning in Israel: Why is Barak's wife going to America with her husband for the negotiations with Syria? (Do you know Mrs. Barak's first name? I didn't. It's Navah.) ......... Coming to Israel? Beware: it seems everybody smokes. ........... Get ready for the giant demonstration against giving away the Golan. Wednesday evening in Tel Aviv. (Because of the rain it's been postponed to Monday night.) .......... I know an Israeli (former American) who I've never seen sit down. Except during the Shabbat meals. For some parts of the davening he sits. Oh yeah, he drives in a sitting position. ............. The Moslems are celebrating the end of Ramadan this weekend. I'm not a "boki" (expert) in their religion and customs (yet), but they don't know until almost the last minute when their holiday begins. Yet they knew that on Thursday they'd be working a half day at most. (By the way, they don't work on Fridays because that's their Sabbath.) I was at an Arab factory on Thursday trying to wrap up a shipment before the onset of their vacation. I found some shirts that had holes in them due to the carelessness of one of the ladies. After her supervisor reprimanded her (in front of everyone) I asked him if he wanted to borrow my knife. He asked why? I said to chop off her head for making the mistake. He laughed. Then he said he can't because the holiday is soon approaching and that wouldn't be nice. Then he turned and with a twinkle in his eye said (in front of everyone), "You know, maybe yes. She's a plump one, with a lot of meat on her. 'Might be good on the holiday!" ....................... What a country! I'm listening to the radio a lot. What is it about the Turtles? Remember them from the sixties? I've heard "Happy Together" at least three times already! Can you imagine?! .......... Also, I've found a cooool station. Belive it or not on more than one occassion I've heard Neil Young (my favorite, the original, unchanged Hippie) and the Velvet Underground. I don't remember ever hearing the Velvet Underground in the States on the radio. ............... It's been raining a lot in Israel lately. But, to make life easier on me, the radio at night plays jazz. Jazz at night in the rain. Very appropriate. Especially when you're driving around lost. (I do that a lot more lately, now that I've moved to Neve Aliza.) ............. Because I work around Arabs a lot, perhaps I'm just super-sensitive, but I tend to notice many that are limping. Because of my sick sense of humor, I always think how they got that way. What were they doing wrong to get in that state? Was it from an Israeli bullet? ........ In our new apartment, near the bed, there's no night stand or night table. So I put my glasses on the floor because I was to lazy to pull over the paino seat. (Yes, our new apartment has a piano. We never had one in the States. We don't know how to play, but what the heck.) So, I said to myself, "Self, you're not going to step on them. No, of course not. Well, thank God before leaving for Israel I bought a second pair of glasses, because guess what? Yup, I stepped on them. The lenses are in tact, but the frames unfortunately are bent out of shape. ........... Listening to the traffic report in the mornings on the radio, I always get a kick out of hearing that traffic is backed up near La Guardia. La Guardia? You see there's an exit on the Ayalon Highway in Tel Aviv called La Guardia. ......... Uri bought a carpet for the living room / dining room. It was really for Avigayil. Now she can sit on the floor playing without freezing her toosh off. She really enjoys it. ........... 1-9-00 I was driving home Saturday night from Mevaseret to Neve Aliza and picked up a yeshiva kid on the road. He mentioned that a bit furhter down the road were a few chasiddashe guys, in their late teens, walking towards the airport. Yes, they were walking along the road with their luggage. I guess they decided that they weren't going to make it by "tremping," and didn't want to miss their flight. I spotted them and stopped alongside and asked, "Where you going?" they all said, "Boro Park." Well, how about if I take you to the airport and then you can get another ride to Boro Park." They all piled in and since it was only 5 minutes out of my way, I dropped them off at TWA in plenty of time for them to make their flight. Unfortunately when I got home I noticed a "Boro Park Hat Box" that one of them left in the back of my car. By the time I noticed it, it would've been too late to drive back to the airport and return it to them before their flight. Oh, well. Uri and I did call the hat store in Boro Park and alerted the owner to notice any Chassidashe young man, with the initials YRM, requesting a hat pronto for a wedding. The hat store guy wasn't very optimistic. Tomorrow morning we're calling TWA. Hopefully they'll tell us who has the YRM initials on that flight. ......... I probably wouldn't have known it if I were in the States, but on Saturday night Israeli radio celebrated what would've been Elvis' 65th birthday. ........... My unoffical, very unscientific poll results concerning the Golan: The people aren't going to give it up so easily. Never mind their religious affiliation. I picked up a Chayelet (female soldier) this morning and I asked her about the Golan. She was opposed to returning it. She knows to many people whose blood was spilled there. She knows people buried there. I managed the courage and asked her, "Didn't they die for a possible peace one day?" She said yes, but that there wasn't going to be a "real peace" with Syria. She was crying as she was talking. She was on her way to serve in her unit on the Golan, by the way. ............... Tomorrow, Monday night, is the giant rally in Rabin Square in Tel Aviv against giving back the Golan. (The rally was held. Unfortunately, it didn't break any records. However, on the positive side, the rally was seen as a real boost to all the people living in the Golan. In addition, not only the super duper Gush Emunim types were there. There was a real cross section of the country out in the cold night showing their solidarity with the Golan residents and their desire to live in peace, but to live in peace in the Golan.) ........... There's a Kollel family here with three very small children - he's English, she's Canadian - who're moving to the Golan tomorrow! Don't laugh - they got a great deal on a house. They also, obviously, are very idealistic. ............. I heard an Israeli musical group on the radio doing "All along the Watchtower" in Hebrew. (Will miracles never cease?!?) ..... I get a wierd feeling coming home. Not just the fact that the apartment is empty. There's no mail (yet), no telephone answering machine (no telephone), no car in the driveway to let me know if Ruth's home or not. It used to be in the old days, when Uri was in Fair Lawn, that when we'd approach the house and see Eema's car we'd say simultaneously, "EEMA'S HOME!" ....... Another wonderfully wierd thing to get used to in Israel is seeing people everywhere talking to themselves. Walking in the street, in the supermarket, at the bus stops, and yes, while they're driving. Actually they're on their cell phones. In the cars they're hand-free with speakers and mikes on or near the windshield. In the street, there's a wire with an earphone and a tiny microphone. Straaaaaaaaange. ........... Once again, I can't emphasize how meaningful certain music is when heard on the radio here. LeHavDil, in this Holy Land, when I hear Joe Cocker's, "A Little Help from My Friends," it really takes me back in time to a lotta wonderful memories. Do you remember where you were during Woodstock? When's the last time you thought about it? ........ I have an associate at work that I get along with very nicely. Over the last number of weeks since we've been working together she's been very helpful. We make small talk every now and then. She tells me about her family, she's not dati (religious), (but is very traditional). She mentioned that she just passed her first trimester and therefore can tell people she's expecting. Well, Mazal Tov! She said it's been difficult these last few years. She already has two kids. She said, not very long ago she had an abortion. "An abortion!!," I said to myself, "that's traditional?" What kind of person is this? Really, she tells me - almost a stranger - ver casually about her abortion? I couldn't take it any longer. I said, "ABORTION?!", she said, "Yeeeesssssss." Wait. She looked too unphased to mean "ABORTION." I asked her, "Do you mean "miscarriage?" She said, "Yes, what's the difference?" In Hebrew the same word is used for both! ....... Back to the Golan. I personally think the slogan that's literally everywhere in the country, literally everywhere - shouldn't be HaAm Im HaGolan, but rather Shalom Im HaGolan. ..... For those thinking about a trip to Israel, now's a great time. The skiing is great at the Hermon, the warmth of the beach at Eilat is just right, the tourists here for Chag HaNoLad (Christmas) are gone, the Y2K and Millennium celebrations are over, political discussions are rampant as they always will be, with talk of returning the Golan, and the President resigning in disgrace. And don't forget this Shabbat is Tu B'Shvat. In Israel there's only one Tu B'Shvat seder. Mazal Tov to Moshe Wechter upon reaching the age of Mitzvot! That's it for now........ Shabbat Shalom to all...... -17-1-00 Well, as you know I'm in the habit of picking up "trempers” – that is people who hitchhike. Mostly it’s chayalim, soldiers, but sometimes it can be your average person. In terms of safety I limit it to people, mostly kids, who are wearing kippot, yarmulkes. I have on occasion thought about what I like to call one of Uri’s Rules. You see, Uri believes that when you see, especially in the Meah Shearim section or the Old City of Jerusalem an eldery Jew with a long white beard chances are they are a very learned Torah sage. Albeit one that just happens to be walking around the streets. So my thought was one of these days a person that pick up has got to be somebody special. Well, you guessed it – it finally happened. I picked up a “tremper” who was actually a messenger of God. Really. he instructed me to drink two glasses of carrot juice everyday to improve my eyesight. He also said that I should not drive as long as I have high blood pressure. That one day I was going to kill someone and spend the rest of my days in jail. He told me to learn in Kollel and not worry about about money issues. He said I have the talent to become a great Rav. Finally, I was given an ultimatum: learn gemarah every night until I fall asleep or he’s going to put a curse on me. I think he did put the curse on me, but I’m not sure. He got out at the next tsomet-crossroads. I danced at my first Israeli simcha as an Israeli this weekend. It was really a lovely, very joyful Bar-Mitzvah. Funny thing happened during the dancing. The guy in front of me, well his gun butt from his waist kept knocking into me! This never happened at the Atrium or at Shomrei Torah. After a while, I sat out a few dances and held Avigayil. But I continued to watch the dancing. I started to crack up. I thought I was watching a Mel Broks comedy. I watched a new Olympic sport – synchronized guns in the holster bobbing up and down as the dancing was going on. On line at the supermarket. I've only got two items, but that doesn't stop the lady behind me with loads of stuff from getting ahead of me. OK. This is Israel. You take the good with the bad. Even though she skipped ahead of me, I got out faster because in Israel you have to bag your own groceries. I only had two items so bagging wasn't the job it was for the woman now behind me. As I was leaving I saw her coming up behind me and I held the door open for her. After all, she had a full laod of bags. She turned to me and said, "Thanks. Wouldn't it be nice if there were more people in the world like us?" I've never written about the health care situation in Israel. With good reason. Unfortunately, there was a terrorist attack the other day in northern Israel, in Chadera. The hospital in Chadera is soooooo bad the victims of the attack were bused to a different city! I had a blue Monday this week. I went to a knitting mill in southern Israel to do an examination of sweaters about to be shipped to the US. They flunked my inspection. This meant that they needed a 100% inspection (as opposed to a statistical sampling). I was going to return the next day for a re-inspection. The factory manager asked if I could trust him to take care of things thereby avoiding the need for me return the next day. I said I really haven't been around long enough to authorize something like that. He asked again. I apologized, but stuck to my guns. I returned the next morning. The plant was closing down. Going out of business. The 110 workers were all being laid off. The manager came to me and said, "I asked you to rely on me." I spent the rest of the day trying to get the merchandise out of the plant. But more importantly, 110 families were now out of work. I had been through plant closings before. But in the States. This was different. Boy, did I cry. The only thing that took it off the top story of the day was the terrorist pipe bomb in Chadera. Thank God no one was killed. But it was "my first terrorist attack" since being in Israel. Boy, did I cry. Anybody out there remember Blood, Sweat and Tears the first time around with Al Kooper? Well I heard "Without Her" recently. It's unbelievable what they play here sometimes. Although I just realized that part of the great music I was hearing was probably off "The Big Chill" soundtrack album. I enjoyed listening to the traffic report on the radio one morning and hearing that there was a bottleneck at Rechov PILICHOWSKI. Yes, there certainly is one. Near Tel Aviv, near the Diaspora Museum. I give private and personal tours if anyone is interested. On the road to the Shomron Settlements (Maale Shomron, Ginot Shomron, Karnei Shomron, etc.) there are lots of raodside fruit and vegetable stands operated by the locals. (Our cousins) Most are tiny: a cart or a few baskets; a table if it's really big. There's one exception. a really big one. In a tent. If you're driving by at night you can't miss it. Under the tent sits the proprietor watching his large, movie size screen television. I was at the airport this afternoon. Arriving from NY was Rav Reuven Feinstein (son of the late Reb Moshe, z"l). Many of his talmidim (students) were on hand to greet him. As he came out of customs his talmidim broke out in song and dance around him. I had never seen that happen at the airport. Now, at the Kotel (Western Wall)...... that's a different story. 21-1-00 This issue of Stu's Stories has been delayed due to the latest snowstorm in Israel. I couldn't get to a PC. Sorry folks, but such is life in Israel. Thursday morning I was in Gaza. It was so warm I had to take off my sweater. I spoke to someone up north in Pardes Chana who was experiencing hurricane- like conditions with wind and rain storms. As I left Gaza and began driving north I began to get hard, driving rain. That afternoon I went to Yerushalayim to take some friends to the airport for a midnight flight. (yeah, right!) The snow was falling in the Holy City. Spectacular. It was hard getting out of the city due to traffic jams. At least the traffic was bumper to bumper. That way the drivers couldn't drive like maniacs under conditions that they weren't at all familiar with. As we left the city finally, the traffic lightened enough that we were able to stop off for dinner at the mall in Mevaseret. Just about all the stores were already closed. 5:00PM Thursday afternoon. But to make everyone happy, KFC was open. What more could one ask for. After dinner, leaving Mevaseret, it was almost mystical driving into the snow in the dark. The snowflakes were huge. It was almost as if God had contracted with Steven Speilberg to create the scene. After about ten minutes though, it was all rain. I spent the night in Neve Aliza and decided not to set my alarm for Friday morning. Well, let me tell you, I awoke to such a snowstorm - minus the winds that generally accompany such a storm in the NY/NJ area. It snowed heavily from about 6:30AM - 10:30AM. The heaviest snowfall in the Shomron region ever. What was crazy was that the snowfall was accompanied by THUNDER. And then what sounded like thunder turned out to be tree limbs breaking under the weight of the heavy, wet snow. That was sad. All these gorgeous trees that had been growing over the last 15 years or so. Or over the last few thousand years. Kids, hundreds of kids, were all over the streets building snowmen. Big ones, small ones, all shapes and sizes. All kinds of glasses and scarves were worn by these Israeli snowmen. Sadly though, by Shabbat afternoon only the glasses and scarves remained on the ground along with a carrot or two. ............... I have to issue an explanation concerning the story about the closing of the knitting mill in Ofakim. My rejection of the shipment did not result in the closing of the mill. The mill was scheduled to close because of financial problems that were going to be solved via a proposed merger with another mill that never happened. So to all of you that thought 110 families were put out of work due to Stuey the Scrooge, no siree....... ................ I was visiting family up north recently. It was my chance to get to know the kids. In a few minutes of course they were wild as can be. I just have that magic touch. What can I say? To make things easier we orderd Domino's Pizza for dinner. The dinner conversation drifted toward my being a vegetarian. Eylon didn't really understand what that meant. His Mom explained that I only eat what grows on trees or from the ground. After a few moments of deep thought and consideration, a big smile developed, Eylon said, "Hey, wait a minute. You can't fool me. Pizza doesn't grow on trees!" ............. So, back to music. I guess somebody brought the Blood, Sweat and Tears album, "Child is father to the Man" into the 88FM radio studio. I heard Al Kooper's "I Can't Quit Her." Now I know just as well as anyone that many, many songs deal with love. Many even deal with some of the sadder apsects. But, boy have I been hearing a lot of songs that touch on lovers no longer seeing each other or missing each other that I just never before noticed. I wonder why? I figured out that hearing the Turtles, "Happy Together" a million times (I heard it again tonight) must mean that the Mossad is using it as a top secret message to its commandos. No other explanation is possible. I mean I like the song, (a lot even) but........ come on...... I heard the Beatles, "Drive My Car". It's funny, but I associate it not just with the Beatles, but with the morning drive time traffic report on CBS-FM. ........... Ruthie and I have a policy that we don't give packages to people going to Israel if those people have their own relatives there. Especially if they have kids and grandkids there. Some friends recently arrived here in Israel from NJ to visit their children and grandchildren. It was so nice seeing them. They not only brought me The Jewish Standard (Bergen County), The Jewsih Week (Metropolitan NY), Shomrei Torah's "HaShomer" (Fair Lawn), but also hugs and kisses from Ruthie. That's A-OK That's also a result of being a mentsch. And thinking a little. Thanks. .......... Uri and Aliza and Avigayil stayed in my apartment for Moshe Wechter's bar- mitzvah. I left my pelephone there over shabbat and disconnected it. The next day, Shabbat, Uri told me that the phone rang at midnight. I told him that it was probably the alarm. I use my cell-phone as an alarm also. I couldn't figure out, though, why it went off and why at midnight. The next day, Sunday, first day of the work week here in Israel, was a tough, tiring day. I turned in early that night. My alarm went off as usual. I felt really refreshed. Took a shower and started getting dressed. I noticed that my wristwatch had stopped at about midnight. Wierd, but it happens. But then I noticed the second hand was still moving. Wait a second. That wasn't my regular wake up alarm. It was the same fluke-y thing that happened to Uri on Friday night. So I actually slept only a few hours. It was only about 12:30AM. So I got undressed and went back to sleep. A little while later the phone rang. I ignored it thinking it was the whack-o alarm. I turned over. The phone rang again. Wait a minute. The alarm has a unique ring to it and an incoming call has a unique sound. This was not the alarm, but an incoming call. I rushed and got it. It was from the States. Friends of Uri and Aliza. "Zayde Stu, did we wake you?" "No, I'm always up at 12:30AM!" "Oh, sorry. We thought you wouldn't answer and we'd just leave you a message on the voice mail. Can you pick us at at the airport when we arrive tomorrow?" Oy vei. ........ There was a school strike in Israel that lasted for about ten days. (It was over right in time for everyone to have off due to the snow!) While all the kids couldn't go to school I saw many who came to work with their parents. Only time will tell how much more was accomplished by these kids than by their parents. I was in a meeting when someone's cell phone rang. Since cell phones are always answered no matter what, she answered the call. She paid attention and then burst out laughing and said goodbye. Her son at home was very bored and called his mom to tell her a joke. ............. Last Saturday we were at a L'Chaim in Bet Shemesh. I very proudly had Avigayil most of the time. She was wearing her Harley-Davidson outfit and of course was the cutest. There was a young couple - newlyweds - that were bickering. Non-stop. It was kinda uncomfortable for me. Except everytime they looked in Avgayil's direction they stopped fighting long enough to tell each other how cute she was. ....... Avigayil is learning how to clap her hands. Everytime her Zayde does something cute she claps! .......... Gut Voch everyone..... When I was in the States I would greet everyone on a Saturday night with "Shavuah Tov." Now that I'm in Israel I've reverted to "Gut Voch." I'm a firm believer in maintaining traditions and God knows, Yiddish is quickly becoming a relic. I also benstch with a mezuman using "Rabbosai mir velen bencthen." Friday night and Shabbat of course, is "Gut Shabbos." I get strange lokks. Uri's Rosh Yeshiva even responded once by saying, "Oh, you speak English!" ...... I spent much of last week up north. We had a visit from an American consultant trying to institute a new Quality Control System in the manufacturing plants. (SPC - Statistical Process Control. I know one person on my list that may be familiar with it...... It's not restricted to the garment industry by any means.) We were at a factory in Chatzor Glilit. (I also had the opportunity to learn about the Biblical story related to Chatzor in the Book of Shoftim - Judges - with Deborah the Prophetess.) The factory should be profiled on 60 Minures. It's a great PR story. The workers are Jews, Arabs, Druse, Moslems, Christians, and former Russians. And everyone gets along. Many live Lebanon. I met one young woman who used to teach Math in Lebanon. Imagine this: She makes more in a sewing factory in Israel than teaching math in Lebanon! How long does it take her to get to work? Two hours. Well, really a half hour, but the paperwork every morning at the border is a killer..... She can't even change her mind and start working in Beirut, for example. Why? Because they won't allow her to because she's worked in Israel. I asked her how anyone knows. She says they know what she eats for breakfast! The scenery up North is magnificent. I don't know which is more breathtaking: the snow on the Golan Heights or the absolutely beauty and serenity of Lake Kinneret. I took Tim, our Christian consulant, on a little sightseeing tour. We went to where Jesus walked on water in the Galilee. He went into the building there while I waited outside and made friends with the tourists from North Carolina. One woman told me how the world was going to end. Ya all see, the Russians are gonna come down from the North and wipe us all out. Even her friend standing next to her looked at her like she was from another planet. I played along and told her that we had the same prophecy in 1973. The Russians supplied all the military power to the Syrians up North. "Ya see", she said, I was right." Only one problem I told her. We're still here, the Russians aren't. And because things are so bad in Syria they have no choice but to try to make some kinda peace treaty with the devil - the Jews! ....... Last week there was a snowstorm in parts of Israel. The only remnant of it are the tree limbs broken and not yet cleaned up. Oh yeah, amidst all the snow and storms, I saw Elvis having a snowball fight at the Kotel. ....... For the past two years, while I had never been into sports, my life was taken over by the Super Bowl. Months in advance to prepare for the marketing and planning. This year I hardly knew it happened. ........ More Israeli soldiers were killed this week in Lebanon. Two were 21 years old. Think about it. Do you know any twenty-one year olds? Here today. Not here tomorrow. One of the fathers was out of the country when he was told the news. .......... That's it for now. Be good. Well I'm continuing my Statistical Process Control seminars. This week we were with a firm that's run by the son of one of Israel's most extremist politicians. I'm surprised the Knesset hasn't thrown him out the way they did to the late Meir Kahane. To give just a bit of insight into the gentleman's psyche I'll tell you the names of his children. First there's the President of this garment company. His name - first name - is Palmach. Palmach was the name of the underground (and therefore illegal ) army during the years before the State of Israel existed. It's an abbreviation for Plugot Machatz. In english that means a group that serves a severe blow. His daughter's name is Masada. Need I say more? Two more kids (that I know of) one named Sayar and one Aravah. Sayar means "a scout" and Aravah means "wilderness." In professional business situations, where Palmach meets Americans, he refers to himself as Paul. I held back when he asked me why I use Stuart and don't change to a Hebrew name. We were with Palmach when we went to his manufacturing site in Irbid, Jordan. He travels even in Jordan with his own Ford Bronco type vehicle. (Fits the bill, right?) And he struts his stuff with giant "HaAm Ihm HaGolan" ("the nation including the Golan") bumper stickers plastered all over the back of the car. Quite a character. ..... Jordan is a pretty poor country. Quite primitive as well. Our driver, I was told, makes $.50 for a days work. Yet in the office that I used during my stay, the woman at the computer - as poor as she was - had a Ricky Martin cd! And the driver on my way back to Israel asked me to stop into the duty free shop to buy him a carton of Marlboro's. I said ok. He's a nice guy. I'm a nice guy. He paid $12.00 for a carton of cigarettes!!!! ... One of the aggravating aspects of the trip: We stayed at the Grand Hyatt in Amman. Very luxurious to say the least. Now get this: we're in Jordan in the first place because the of the Peace treaty signed by Israel and Jordan. To make the deal sweeter the US of A agreed to extremely beneficial trade agreements between both countries and the USA. So even if the peace isn't so warm I would've at least expected to see Israel mentioned on the chart listing foreign exchange rates. Or listed in the foreign country codes telephone directory. But, no. Not yet, anyway. ..... At the hotel while I was checking out my email in one of the shops, a young woman from the Philippines approached me. Initially she asked for help in using the computer. Then she began to tell me her plight. She's been working as a maid in a private home. Without actually asking I think she was abused there. She was now out of the situation but now needed work desperately. Without a job she would get thrown out of the country. She was also the sole means of support for her family back in the Philippines. I was really sad for her. But what could I do? She wanted to go to Israel, but couldn't get a visa. You need to know someone. I would've gladly offered to sponsor her, but I'm not an Israeli yet. I invited her up to my room for a drink.... (No, Danny. I really didn't. I'm just trying to add some spice to the story.) I had to leave the situation as I found it. But it made me realize, once again, that we need to count our blessings all the time. .... When my associate, Tim, a Mormon from PA., had Saturday off he visited the Kotel - the Western Wall. He was spiritually moved. He fell in love with the country and the Israelis. (OK, so he's a little wack-o.) He said that he felt a difference praying in Jordan compared to reciting his prayers in Israel. ... In my interactions with the Jordanians I once again became quite uncomfortable. If I were dealing with people from Sri Lanka or the Orient I would simply welcome the occasion to make friends of people from different areas around the world; I'd even consider inviting them over to my home if they ever visited my country. Yet when it comes to the Arabs I hesitate even allowing myself to enjoy their company and the normal exchange between two human beings. It's very disconcerting. I even began comparing it - and understanding on a certain level -the attitudes of distrust that Afro-Americans sometimes have towards whites. I don't know. Aren't people people? When I taught a new concept to an Arab sewing machine operator and I can literally see the joy on her face from learning a new and useful concept, I also experience that satisfaction. I smile along with her. Yet, there's that something... Very disconcerting. .... During the series of meetings and seminars in Jordan we were constantly being interrupted. To the extent that the situation became downright untenable. I locked the doors and had a sign made up in, Arabic that basically said, "Do not Disturb - Penalty is a Slow and Agonizing Death." Whenever someone tried to get in they were ignored. At one point someone didn't give up trying to get in. I finally lost my cool. "I opened the door and yelled at the poor Arab worker, who to begin with, walks with her head down, always scurrying all over the place, (you know like in the movies). I was told that we had some visitors from the American Embassy that would like to meet us. "Sure. And would you like to buy a bridge I own in Brooklyn?", I said. But sure enough there they were. Two officers from the good ole USA. They were from the economic office and were just looking at all the plants in the area doing business with America. We got to talking and of course, "where'ya from?" always comes up. Bergen County. Yeah? Me too. Where? Near Patterson. Hey, I'm from Fair Lawn. Wow, I'm from Glen Rock. Small world. At least I have a contact at the US embassy. Just in case. Ya neva know. .... The drive from the Jordanian border, near Bet Shaan in Israel, to Irbid, where there's a Free Trade Industrial Zone is about an hour. The poverty and change of lifestyle as we drive through these villages is not only tremendous, but even unnerving. I'm sure this is where the Indiana Jones' movies were filmed. In the evenings you never see woman walking around. As a matter of fact, working overtime is a problem here, because most girls must be home before dark. 'Doesn't look right otherwise. ( Daddy'll chop off their head...) Some of the more modern butcher shops now hang their sides of meat wrapped in plastic. State of the art. It's also great seeing the sheep hanging out outside the stores - waiting their turn. It's a baaahhhhhd situation. (Sorry, Tim's joke.) ... 3/2/00 Ever have the feeling that for every person on the planet there's a double of them - somewhere? Same face, same walk, sometimes even the same mannerisms. I've often thought that. Even experienced it. The most fun is when I'm walking with Ruth and all of a sudden we'll see someone and turn to each other and at the same time say, "Doesn't that person look like (fill in the blank)." At one of the factories up north I saw two people who I swore were the doubles of girls back in Fair Lawn. What were they doing at the Lebanese border? .......... While I was traveling up north, I was pretty close to the Golan. The drive is very pretty and skirts around the Kinneret. One of Gods most beautiful sights in Israel is Lake Kinneret. Especially breathtaking is the view from above. I drove this stretch with a chayelet, a female soldier, from the area. We passed a sign on the road that designated that particular spot as the sight of the pre-1967 Six Day War borders. Oh, man! If anyone visits that area and gets a glimpse at what those in power are contemplating returning to the Syrians, it's nothing less than mind-boggling. The beauty, the water rights and Lake Kineret, not to mention security conditions that I can't even discuss, (I'd have to kill you afterwards) it's too much even for an old, liberal fart like myself. ........... We all hear about bootlegging. Movies, cd's, designer clothing. I was walking along the main shopping strip in Raanana and passed a music shop that was selling cd's for 10 shekel. Roughly $2.50 apiece. I couldn't resist. Not much of a selection, but you can't beat the prices. So, after much deliberation I chose the Best of the Police, and the Best of the Beatles. How could I go wrong? I quickly put them on once I got home. Ruthie brought me a cd player on her recent trip. Well, the cd's were certainly the "best of....", but unfortunately they weren't sung by the original artists. How's the saying go? You learn something new everyday. Or would you prefer, "There's a sucker born every minute." .......... I recently received an email from a friend back in NJ telling me about some of the goings on around town. It dawned on me that I was now so removed from all that stuff. (No more politics....) I used to be so much a part of it; used to contribute so much time towards it. The funny thing, perhaps ironic, is that I don't feel any loss; don't feel any worse for it. I always thought it would be part of me. It's funny how things have a way of working. I used to think, when we lived in Brooklyn, that Uri would graduate from the Yeshiva of Flatbush....... ....... 26/3/00 Well, it's been a while. So we'll start off with a bang. I got a call this morning from Uri on my way to work at about 6:00AM. Aliza and Avigayil were in a car accident the night before. Thank God they're ok. They were returning from a birthday party up north, Zichron Yaakov. They were in a van with about 10 other people. The van was rear-ended, pushed forward, and rolled over a few times. Because it was late at night, Aliza was asleep in the van. The next she knew she was awake out of the van on the ground looking at the scattered people ("bodies" sounds too gruesome, but that's what she saw...) Where's Avigayil? She saw Avigayil lying on the ground crying. There was a car coming. Aliza immediately stopped the car from coming - and picked up - SAVED - Avigayil (Yeah - SuperAliza). There were other kids in the van that Aliza pulled to safety. After everyone left the van, the van pretty much collapsed. People driving by saw what happened, stopped on the spot and got out to help. Some people getting a glimpse of the van couldn't believe that there were no serious injuries. Maybe a broken bone or two. Some bystanders asked the injured to give them a bracha, a blessing, because they must have been touched by angels. Twas truly a miracle. The ambulances arrived and took them to Hadassah Emergency Room in Jerusalem. Uri was awakened by Aliza at about 2:00AM. He tells me that he never got a taxi as fast as he did that night/morning. And that the taxi driver never made it to the emergency room from Mevaseret in such record time. One of the saddest/weepiest sights was Avigayil going in for a CAT scan. Here was this cute little baby, lying on the mat in this humongous piece of machinery. She was given a sedative so that she would sleep and not roll off the mat. Uri was with her. Thank God everything checked out fine. For both Avigayil and her mommy, Aliza. Uri stayed with them all through the ordeal. Emergency rooms are an experience wherever they are. Hadassah is no different. We had some friends visiting from Fair Lawn. A doctor / nurse couple. They were supposed to get in touch with a mutual friend, also a doctor, head of one of the critical care departments at Hadassah about some job contacts and possiblities for future aliyah. I called him right after speaking to Uri at 6:00AM to get the phone number of our friend at Hadassah. I reached him at 6:30AM to let him know that my kids were in his emergency room. He told he would take care of things. Uri later told me when Dr. Dept. Head arrived, all of a sudden doctors and nurses came out of the woodwork to offer TLC and attention to Aliza and Avigayil. The squeaky wheel always gets the grease. I just arrived at the apartment. Uri and Aliza are fast asleep. Avigayil is playing and spry and happy as can be. I even took videos. It'll be a tough couple of days, but hey, everyone wants some hired help to clean for Pesach anyway, right? (At the hospital, Uri and Aliza saw a woman they recognized from somewhere. They just couldn't put their finger on it. Where did they know this doctor from? Then it dawned on them. This woman, a doctor in the emergency room, was at their neighbors a few weeks ago cleaning their apartment for Pesach! That's why the doctors are on strike in Israel. Wages are really, really low.) ......... I spent Shabbat at a place called Chashmonayim. There are a lot of Americans there. One of the interesting things about the place was actually when I was leaving. Driving was kind of hazardous because of all the joggers out on the roads as soon as Shabbat was over. Ever notice that most people that jog are fit and trim? I stayed at friends that we've know for a very long time. It all began in fourth grade in the Yeshiva of Eastern Parkway. During our sheva brachos, almost 25 years ago, they even slept over in our basement apartment. That was a first, right? The Shabbat before I was in the Old City of Jerusalem. I hadn't thought about it, but it was going to be the first time in about 12 years that I was going to spend a shabbat there. It was quite wonderful. It was my first time at the Kotel, Western Wall, since I arrived in November. But, generally speaking, there was an allure, a certain romaticism even, that suddenly the Old City held for me. Of course, I'm the first in the history of mankind to experience this sensation. I spent some free time on Shabbat afternoon just strolling up and down the alleyways. All different kinds of people just walking around. Everybody feeling the warmth of Shabbat. One way or another. .......... Speaking of all kinds of people........ One of the manufacturing plants that I visit has a cafeteria. I usually don't eat there. Of course, it's kosher, but after all, I'm not one of the "company men." But every now and then, someone twists my arm and drags me along. So I go, especially if I've been there since 7:00 in the morning, working without a break. And by the way, the food is excellent. It's as if my mother is back there in the kitchen whipping up a variety of East European delicacies. One day as I sat there eating it dawned on me. What a variety of mankind sitting eating in this lunchroom! From every country, from every walk of life. Now eating lunch together, all citizens of the State of Israel. Wow! That's what this place is all about. ........ Remember my disgust at the outrageous comments of one of our leading Rabbis? Well, during the reading of the Megillah on Purim, some members of the audience actually shouted out the name of the Knesset member that they wanted to linch! The following night in Jerusalem the Rabbi announced prior to the reading that everyone should behave themselves and not shout out names. The news reporters were actually surprised that the crowds listened. But things don't change so quickly. The Rabbi, just last night, compared this Knesset member to Pharoh! I just don't get it! What does he think he's accomplishing? One member of Knesset in a show of sympathy and support to Mr. Sarid took off his yarmulke and vowed never to wear it again. That's how disenchanted and disgusted he was he was. Mr. Sarid convinced him to put it back on.